I had a bizarre dream last night, I was in a bath tub with two of my friends from home (fully clothed you perverts!) and we were sitting facing each other – so it must have been a big bath tub – and we were singing a song composed by Richard Branson (I know, right?) and we were crying, or at least I was. How strange…especially since that’s all I can remember!

I discovered yesterday that more people are reading this blog than I originally thought, or at least I found out a couple of people are reading that I didn’t know were… I mean, I click on my ‘dashboard’ and it tells me how many people click through my facebook link to this blog. However, I can’t tell if it’s the same person clicking each time or if it’s different people, so I really have no way of knowing who’s reading. It’s not really my fault, I suppose, since people don’t go out of their way to tell me they’re reading and if we’re not otherwise communicating or don’t talk very often it’s a little egocentric of me to assume everyone’s reading.

Not to mention – it’s a little unfair if people know everything going on in my life but won’t even drop me a comment to say hi and tell me how things are going with them right? If there’s no effort to chat to me day by day but you’re reading my blog so you can keep up with what’s going on, how could I possibly be expected to figure that out?

I did consider making the blog ‘friends only’, which would force people to create an account to read and then I’d have a better idea of who was reading but that defeats the purpose of a public blog. But I can’t really be held over a barrel for upsetting people with what I’m writing, if I have no idea that they’ll be reading what I’m writing.

Aside from that though, I used to be a lot more openly honest than I have been lately. Like a brutal honesty, almost honesty to a fault. I managed to really upset a friend of mine with my brutal honesty though and it almost destroyed our friendship, we didn’t talk for a long time and I have, not consciously, turned into a passive aggressive diva-esque imposter!

I don’t know, it’s been an odd week. The mantra here in Houston seems to be, if you’re having a bad time, you go into shut down. Since Rowan left I’ve been in a funk, I shut down, I’ve not wanted to see people, talk to people, do anything or go anywhere. I was talking to some people at the coffee morning yesterday and they said they’ve been down and sad over the last week as well and they shut down and didn’t reach out either.

It’s quite the 180 I’ve pulled, I used to reach out all the time, probably to too many people and everyone always knew when something was up with me.  I relied heavily on my friends to get me through the ‘dark times’, maybe it’s a good thing that I’m a little more independent and only reach out when I feel like it’s too much.  Maybe that’s a good thing, a healthier thing…or maybe I just rely more on Col…

I needed the coffee morning yesterday though, I met some wonderful new ladies who I’d previously been emailing before they moved here – it was nice to put faces to names and get a feel for some of the ladies.  I’m so glad I put together the summer events cause from the turn out thus far, everyone else needed it too – newbies and ‘oldies’ alike.  I even got a lovely gift from one of my friends here, Norma.  She gave me a candle (cause she know’s how big a ‘yankee’ fan I am) made by a company called ‘Tyler’ – I think I smell a purchase coming on! lol!

It did leave the house like a disaster zone though and having kids running around my bedroom, I can’t say was one of my highlights – mainly because my bed wasn’t made and the place is a tip upstairs and all I could think was these kids are going to go home and tell their parents ‘That lady is a slob’ (or for those at home ‘thon wumman is a right gyppo’) LOL!

Once everyone had left, I cleaned up (which left me knackered), poured a cuppa and sat on my backside for a while, I’ve run out of my decaf teabags so had to break my no-caffeine rule for a cup.  I had 2 cups yesterday, both before 6 pm and at 1.30am, I’m lying in bed, (as Corin would say) ‘buzzin’, I swear, it’s amazing how much caffeine actually affects you – especially when you’ve not had it for ages!

Beyond that, I joined Col on his trip to footie in Pearland last night for the first time in a few weeks and decided I really need to get back into the pool, it’s been 3 weeks and ok I’m still exercising, I miss the water!

Things are quiet, we’re just decompressing after the hubub of the last few weeks and taking things easy.  Wedding plans need shifted up a gear but for a lot of things we need final numbers to organise (like transportation) and for those kinds of things we’ve got to wait for the RSVPs to trickle in, so it’s a waiting game.

As for the non-number specific things, for those we need to wait to get some more money about us, it’s tough paying for a wedding all by your loney-o! I’m so impatient though, I keep finding stuff I want to get for the wedding and have to hold off until the next pay cycle, it’s frustrating! LOL!

I am, however taking some inspiration and advice from my friend Lisa Marie who got hitched not long ago and had, what looked to be THE most fun wedding, EVER!

“The bride wore red”

Isn’t she a gorgeous bride? I’m definitely sending a bunch of these to my photographer for inspiration for our wedding pictures, although I don’t think my dress would fit in a dodgem car!

Until next time… <3